(no subject)

Gah, I'm tired. Maybe going to bed at 9 to wake up at 4:30 isn't the greatest plan. I was tryig to catch the LAZY HIPPIE, AKA: TITUS, but I guess I missed him... Instead, I caught something else. Now I'm just confused about a lot of things.... I dont wan' love anymore. I want it to leave me alone and never come back... so I can live the rest of my logical life with none of these heart-pounding dramas -_-. It probably would be a lie to say that what I wanted from my uh "subject of my last entry like this" 0_o. Rarg, if I wasn't afraid of him being pissed at "publically humiliating him", I'd just use his name >:O. I'm the one with nothing to hide. Anyway, it'd be a lie to say that what I wanted was not what I read... but I don't think I'm completely satisfied. Actually, all along, I *knew* he'd write something... but I also knew, that whatever It'd be, I wouldn't be completely at ease... I think the one thing I'm most distraught about is the fact that he think I want to forget him. I don't know how on earth I can make it more clear to him that I'd never do that -_-. But he can think what he wants, I suppose. Because in the end, what matters is the way *I* feel. After all, it is myself that will get me to him.

A part of me thinks that he is the one who wants to forget me and forget *I* ever even happened. After all, apparently I am number... five XD. And he was number one in my own book , hehe. I am just *another* chapter in his very extensive book about his lovelife. I wish he were like me and didn't love so easily. But he had none of this when he was my age. I still doubt I'd be like that in 10 years time....

That all being said, I still miss him ._. . And I still find myself longing, and even *gasp* find tears,though all this. And I will for a long time. However long I decide to keep this charade up. I did promise I'd come back, and I will...

I am such a spoiled child ^_________^

*brat* XD. Hey, I'm an only child. It's some unwritten law that only children are spoiled to death by their parents. I never have surprises for my b-day, instead my parents always buy my presents early XD. So I got most of them today!! TOday, my mom and I went to the mall and she got me...

-Some new shoes(this she FORCED upon me, though, heh)
-THE "Crest of the Stars" BOXSET!!!!!
-New vary cute PJs : )
and..... OCARINA OF TIME!!

^__^. My dad was supposed to get me that one, but she just said she'd buy it. She *rarely* says no when I take her into the store XD. For the boxset, the conversation went as follows:

Me: Moooooom! OMG I found this REALLY cool thing I want for my birthday! Come see it!
Mom: I'm not getting it, you already have enough cartoons
Me: Aww.. but it's for my birthday ;_;. Just come see it!!
Mom: Fine...
Me: Look! Isn't it coooool! It's the chick on my laptop!
Mom: Oh her, she's cute. ..... How much is it?
Me: It's a boxset, so it's 50 bucks
Mom: Oh FINE. But this is all you're getting.

About ten minutes later ^_-

Me: Let's go into the video games store! There is something I want to look at.
Mom: I told you I'm not buying you anything else
Me: I know, but let's go in anyway
Mom: Fine
Me: *asks to see the price of a used Zelda Game* Can you hold this for me?
Dude: Only until the end of the day
Me: I don't know, then...
Mom: Let's just buy it now.
Me: yeeyy!! Thank you ^____________^

Hehe, my mom is vary silly when it comes to buying things for me XD. And this is after she swore never to buy me any more games.

And now, for some gaming news... I've seen a handheld console I'm interested in. It's a new Sega one, forgot the name.... but it looks like you can play all the new sega games on it. I don't think it's even out get. It's called Next Gen or something 0_o. I'd like some info.. hmm

In my future, I'll be looking at buying a few more games. I talked to my dormmate the other day, and she is the ONLY female gamer I've ever met! So I'm so excited XD. She's bringing her 'cube, and I'm bringing the rest of my nintendos... We'll be gaming LOTS. She's also really into Wind Waker XD. There is nothing in particular I want to buy right now, except maybe the Sonic Mega Collection... In the future, I'll be looking into "Kirby's Air Ride" for a racing game and PERHAPS the new Mario Cart. Problem with the latter is something extremely important for me- They fucking got rid of my favorite character -___-. Toad is gone ;_;. I'm really UPSET. I always would play as Toad in the other Mario Carts ;______;. Super Mario Cart on the SNES is one of my very first games -_-. I'm like a pro at that one... Beat Rainbow road- first place on the most difficult cup several times. *cough*Titussucks*cough* Anyway, Toad is also my favorite Nintendo character- ever -_-. He's first , followed by Diddy Kong, and Then King Dedede... *siiiiiiiiiiigh* I'm pissed. Bah. I'll also be looking at the new DK game- whatever THAT will be, I'm fucking getting it. Because DK is what originally got me off the Peecee games and into nintendo... *nostalgic* ^_^. It's been a little while since I've cracked open DKC2 and DKC too...

And the new Zelda - ALSO is in store. I swear, what nintendo has done with Zelda is simply amazing. The originals on nintendo were pretty good, but they just kept getting better and better. My first Zelda Experience was "A Link to the Past" back on the SNES- it was created '90 0_o. Zelda's like almost 20 years old... And each game just keeps getting better and better and better. Such a thing *rarely* happens... But Wind Waker is just SO awsome, and I'm sure its sequel will be too. Right now, though. I'm holding off on the second quest at least until I can get my own game so I'd wanna play it XD. And I'll be spending some more time on my new Ocarina of Time ^________^. SO that's what's in the future for me, gaming-wise...

*insanely cris*

I KNEW IT! I EFFING KNEW IT !

#{)*^@)(@%^@)*&%@)(*&$.

When I stopped at Kingston I knew it sounded SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO familar, and I was right. I just talked to Tuffie and she said it was her town 0_o. I stayed the night there too, and she was away at caaaaaamp.

Oh well! I was talking to Jeferry and... he's staying the night!!! I'm so excited! Lots of cuddles ^__^. Anyway, my parents gave the okay. He's spending the night for my birthday : ). Probably coming thursday and leaving friday... It will be loads of fun. I'll invite him, Adrienne, and Alexis for Russian food on my b-day : ). I know what Adrienne got me XD and Alexis has something in mind too, I guess ^_-. Now all I need is that dildo SOMEONE promised me ^_-.

I'm kinda depressed now. Slaggie became the middle man between me and TG today , and now a lot more is clear to me... I still don't know if I wanna talk to him like right this moment, though... Right now, I don't know if I need more time to think, or if I'll be okay. I'm really not so bitter anymore, and I miss him more than anything that I really need to think about... It sort of feels like I am playing hard to get, but I'm not even trying to ~_~. I guess I wanted to come back on my own time, when I was ready to. Now I know it isn't going to be months, or even weeks... but days. That should be plenty of time, heh.

Some day I will have a NY-related entry... really! I'm not lying XD