zaichikarky (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
zaichikarky) wrote2010-11-24 12:55 am
zaichikarky) wrote2010-11-24 12:55 am
LJ Idol Topic 4: Elephant in the Room
Neither of my grandmothers really chose their husbands well. My grandmother on my dad's side chose a man who was so paranoid, he had to spend time in a durdom(literally "idiot house"). He at least kept away from the vodka and helped us immigrate to the US. He wasn't present much in my dad's life, but maybe that was for the better. He died when I was only 7 years old.
My grandmother on my mom's side was far worse. Both her husbands were alcoholics and neither of her marriages lasted very wrong. Her first husband, my mother's father, I only know his name because the Russian middle name is built from the father's first name. I once saw a picture of him, the only one we have because he burnt the rest of them. It's him and my mother. She looks like she's around 5 and she has her arm around him. He was really attractive. My mother looks so much like him. I would sometimes stare at that picture and wonder about him. What were his interests? Did he have any besides drinking? Maybe he didn't.
He was a really bad man, to say the least. He traumatized my mother once by threatening my grandmother with a knife one night he came home drunk. My mom says that she's had a stutter ever since because of that incident. My grandmother once showed me pictures from her wedding. She said "here is me and my friends, my husband is out drinking..." My mom says the last she heard from him was that he said he wanted to have a "man to man" conversation with my dad. This was after he asked her for money. We moved to the US shortly afterward.
I must say that I wonder about my real grandfather much less than I think about my grandmother's second husband. Victor Enreich was a very amiable man. Ok, so he was a drunkard too. But he was not an abusive drunk, on the contrary, he was quite a friendly drunk. His problem was that he was a little too friendly. When he'd start drinking, he'd have sex with everyone. The thing was, it didn't matter if it was a man or a woman. In the Soviet Union, something like that could really get you in trouble, so this was kept hush-hush, but nosy women couldn't help telling my mom all about this. I wonder if my grandmother still doesn't know to this day.
Victor Enreich is really a man of mystery to me, but I want to know more about him. This was the man, when my mom had a drunken episode and clogged the sink with her bra, drowning all the floors beneath her, came in and fixed the problem. This was the man who encouraged everyone to drink happily with him. This was the man who treated me as if I were his real grand daughter by blood. My mom said that he really loved me and brought me home toys all the time. We immigrated to the US and shortly thereafter came the second divorce since eventually she found out about all the cheating. She's been single ever since.
I have never seen a picture of him. This time, my grandmother probably burned all the pictures. I want to ask my grandmother more about what he was like. He may still be alive. We've never been back to Russia, but the the last time my grandmother went, she said she saw him. She probably ran away as soon as she caught sight of him, though. I bet he would have been happy to see her. He was only part of my life for such a short time. I wasn't even 5 when I moved away from Russia. I wonder if he remembers me. I wish I could meet him and thank him for being kind to me when I was little. Most of all, I wish I could ask my grandmother more about him... she told me that she had been in love once in her life. She never told me who it was. Could it have been Victor Enreich? This is also something I often think about. Maybe someday I will ask her that.
My grandmother on my mom's side was far worse. Both her husbands were alcoholics and neither of her marriages lasted very wrong. Her first husband, my mother's father, I only know his name because the Russian middle name is built from the father's first name. I once saw a picture of him, the only one we have because he burnt the rest of them. It's him and my mother. She looks like she's around 5 and she has her arm around him. He was really attractive. My mother looks so much like him. I would sometimes stare at that picture and wonder about him. What were his interests? Did he have any besides drinking? Maybe he didn't.
He was a really bad man, to say the least. He traumatized my mother once by threatening my grandmother with a knife one night he came home drunk. My mom says that she's had a stutter ever since because of that incident. My grandmother once showed me pictures from her wedding. She said "here is me and my friends, my husband is out drinking..." My mom says the last she heard from him was that he said he wanted to have a "man to man" conversation with my dad. This was after he asked her for money. We moved to the US shortly afterward.
I must say that I wonder about my real grandfather much less than I think about my grandmother's second husband. Victor Enreich was a very amiable man. Ok, so he was a drunkard too. But he was not an abusive drunk, on the contrary, he was quite a friendly drunk. His problem was that he was a little too friendly. When he'd start drinking, he'd have sex with everyone. The thing was, it didn't matter if it was a man or a woman. In the Soviet Union, something like that could really get you in trouble, so this was kept hush-hush, but nosy women couldn't help telling my mom all about this. I wonder if my grandmother still doesn't know to this day.
Victor Enreich is really a man of mystery to me, but I want to know more about him. This was the man, when my mom had a drunken episode and clogged the sink with her bra, drowning all the floors beneath her, came in and fixed the problem. This was the man who encouraged everyone to drink happily with him. This was the man who treated me as if I were his real grand daughter by blood. My mom said that he really loved me and brought me home toys all the time. We immigrated to the US and shortly thereafter came the second divorce since eventually she found out about all the cheating. She's been single ever since.
I have never seen a picture of him. This time, my grandmother probably burned all the pictures. I want to ask my grandmother more about what he was like. He may still be alive. We've never been back to Russia, but the the last time my grandmother went, she said she saw him. She probably ran away as soon as she caught sight of him, though. I bet he would have been happy to see her. He was only part of my life for such a short time. I wasn't even 5 when I moved away from Russia. I wonder if he remembers me. I wish I could meet him and thank him for being kind to me when I was little. Most of all, I wish I could ask my grandmother more about him... she told me that she had been in love once in her life. She never told me who it was. Could it have been Victor Enreich? This is also something I often think about. Maybe someday I will ask her that.
no subject